Dealing With Staying Home – A Better Happier You Is Possible

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Photo by Julia M Cameron

Dealing With Staying Home – A Better Happier You Is Possible

Whether we are ill and confined to home for a while or in the midst of a pandemic, certain things matter. I saw this quote today and wonder if it grabs your attention as it did mine?

“Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.” -Goethe.

After all this is over the only thing that will matter is how we treated one another.
And how we treat ourselves is critical and equally important.

Once things normalize, will we have complained each day or will we be able to say that we accomplished something? Will we be able to say that we lost weight, gained muscle tone, learned a language, picked up a new skill, took one of the many few online courses available right now, got closer to friends by checking on them, or read a couple of good books? What can we do to make ourselves proud when we emerge from this isolation?

A large network of friends, often called a social support network, has long been a proven key to good mental health. And we all need it more now than ever. When we take the slightest chance to be thoughtful by telling someone we know that we’d like to know that they are OK, or mention something they did or talent of theirs or thing that they do which makes them special or stand out – or any excuse at all you make yourself a better, kinder, softer, more loving person which only attracts more love and kindness right back at you and into your life, which is often called Karmic mirroring.

A wealth of research shows that when we “commit acts of kindness” for others, our brains release oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine – a powerful feel-good cocktail that boosts mood and counteracts the effect of cortisol which is the stress hormone.

Helping others has also been proven to be one of the very fastest and surest ways of increasing self-esteem. Since self-esteem can go up and down a bit throughout our lifetimes, it is smart to keep it high, healthy, and self-refilling all the time.

This pandemic gives us a chance to help ourselves by helping others.
Who do you need to contact today, to check in with, to say hello to?

We are lucky to have so many free resources available right now. Most libraries have free current movies, audio, and Kindle books, and also Mango with multiple language courses. Yale University is offering has its famous, most popular course in history, “The Science of Well-Being”, often called their Happiness course. It’s free, no tests, no reading. Other Universities, including Stanford University, are offering courses also. Also, there are a lot of virtual museum tours online that are stunning.

I’m sure you know of the many physical and mental benefits of meditation. I hope you will try out during this unusual downtime a couple of the MANY different styles since even if you’ve tried before even if you couldn’t empty your mind and be calm, please know that you don’t need to.

There’s a very famous Buddhist monk, actor, playwright and much more (you can check him out on Wikipedia), Peter Coyote, who has filmed two Dharma talks over the past two weeks that are excellent. He simply shares about meditation, doesn’t tell you what to do or lead you in one. I think you might find it very interesting. It’s free on YouTube: SFZendog if you want to check it out. He’s been asked to do these every week but I don’t know his decision about that.

Stay safe,


Sharon Valentino, MA, ChT, CA LMFT, Psychotherapist, Behavioral Health
Calif. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, MFC51746
Masters Level Registered Addiction Specialist (MRAS) & Level IV Certified Addiction Treatment Counselor (CATC IV), Masters Counseling Psychology
Addressing: Stress, Anxiety, Relationships, Depression, PTSD, Trauma, Pain, Memory Issues, Addiction, Adult Children of Alcoholics/Substance/Anger Abusers (ACA’s), Tech Execs & Engineers, Creatives & Designers – Private Online Therapy (Telemedicine) is available via HIPPA provider’s security.
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About Valentino Therapy

Psychotherapist (California Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist), artist, animal lover, SF Giants fan...I write mostly about daily life and psychology matters, concerns and disorders and how to get help or help yourself. I write about life and often laugh at it but I also write about very serious matters that affect our lives. I'm a psychotherapist (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist) with a speciality in addiction, anxiety, depression, achievement, relationships and several other areas, which is work I particularly enjoy but the nature of it requires that I also enjoy other creative and physical pursuits. Personal: I love animals beyond a reasonable measure (reptiles excluded).
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